Dear Kingsford,
Please do not sell me a bag of your charcoal with the pictures on the back printed with the words "easy light grooves making for quick ignite". By quick ignite do you mean an hour of me shredding every last piece of paper that I own? Do you chuckle at the thought of random grill users scrounging around the woods like a boy scout looking for sticks to build this campfire required to get some ashy coals? Why didnt you put the words "Apply starter fluid" In CAPITAL LETTERS so I would have thought to pick some up at the Depot when I was already there. Youre lucky my husband came home because I had already gotten the torch out and was about to grab the gas can. We almost had to eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches because of you and your evil. Then, I got to get a lesson on how to light charcoal from the 'teacher' and I was even more annoyed. I dont care if I have to build a pyramid over paper and twigs to get you to light. This is the reason you, charcoal homemade barrel grill thingy, that you get banished to the lot line, and that your nemisis-propane grill gets top bidding on the deck. He lights when I push a button. He also has a side burner as who doesnt like to multitask.
He cannot however, replicate the delicious flavor you envelope every food that touches you with. Today, it was steaks for daddy and the kids and ckn breast for me. I guess you are worth the effort and I may quite possibly get another pin on my girl scout sash once I conquer your 5-step ignition process.
Grocery list:
Lighter Fluid.
No comments:
Post a Comment